.4 Holding On

I was supposed to meet NotBoyfriend for a few hours just to hang out one last time, look at his stupid, beautiful face and say goodbye. Unfortunately he was wiped out when he got home from work and I let him off the hook.

But really, this is just more proof that I was holding on to absolutely anything that seemed like he might come back to me. I was grasping for anything and everything that seemed like “you’re worth it” or “wait me for.” I wish I could destroy the hopeless part of my romantic side more often than not.

Don’t hold on. I shouldn’t be holding on. I should never hold on when I know they aren’t trying to either. But now it’s time for me sleep it off, to get up and fly away. Whatever I had here isn’t mine to have anymore. It’s time to make something of myself back in the states and hope all goes for the best.

Let the games begin.


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